Monday, August 8, 2016

A Blessing for My Teenage Daughters

Note: I wrote this to my teenage daughters (aged 13 and 15) on the eve of the first day of school (grades 8 and 10) because the speaker at our youth camp had basically told me to share with them everything I've been praying for them. This hot mess of a letter is the result.

July 31, 2016

I am writing this to you because I am not great at talking about the Important Stuff. I get sidetracked, your eyes glaze over, I start waving my hands around, and before I know it 30 minutes have gone by and I’m not sure I even communicated what I needed to.

What I’m writing today is Important. It’s Important because on July 6, God decided to show my name to our speaker at camp because He—God—had something to say to me. I cannot stress enough that THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN EVERY DAY.                

WHAT God wanted to say to me—and to you and your sister—was so important that he interrupted the speaker, and Camp, to tell us all about it.
I’ll recap what he said here:

What I have fought for, I need to pass on to you guys.
What I have prayed for you and your sister, I need to tell you so that God can make it happen.
What I have achieved with Him, you guys will have the power and grace to do better.

I’ve spent a few weeks asking God exactly what I’m supposed to bestow upon you girls, because if I’m honest, I pray for you all the time. The teenage phase has pushed me to my limits (so far) of prayer and trust that you, although you’re my daughters, are also GOD’S, and he is raising you.

I pray a lot for the stuff you’d expect me to: that you don’t hurt your body with drugs or alcohol or an unwanted pregnancy; that you don’t get your heart broken by a boy when you’re too young to recover; that you have a healthy body image and know that it’s who you are not how you look that counts.

AND THAT STUFF IS SUPER IMPORTANT…

But you could reach the age of 30 having achieved all of the above and still miss what I really want for you: that you live a life of power.

Believe me, staying away from drugs and saving yourself for marriage and being kind is a mother’s dream for her kids, but God’s dream is more and bigger: that you live a life dependent on his Holy Spirit, which will give you power to be radically kind, adventurous, encouraging, daring, loving, outlandish, patient, creative, and literally brilliant with who HE has made you to be.

It means actually loving your enemies. It means not giving a crap about what that mean girl thinks of you; and even better, hoping and praying for HER best, because she is a child of God, too. It means passing over what is safe and “just okay” for what is amazing and makes you passionate. It means saying “I don’t care if it’s normal or safe or popular or makes money, it’s hard and it’s beautiful and it’s true so I’m doing it.”

The fact that God spoke through the camp speaker wasn’t just for me, it was for you as well. Because our world needs people who love God in a new way. A way that powerfully teaches young people—YOUR PEOPLE—who He is without condemning them. A way that shows kindness over popularity and compassion over “we’re going to Heaven and you’re not.” Being that person takes work, and it takes God’s spirit, which is endlessly gracious, merciful, and loves every darn person that breathes on this planet.

Be brave. Do important things. Don’t settle for a life that is boring and empty, even as a teen, even in school. The reason camp and mission trips are so meaningful is that we get closer to the place where God’s kingdom and the world rub together (borrowing some words from our youth pastor here); in those situations we are doing God’s work with His spirit, and they feel real, like an adventure.

But life can be that way. School can be that way. Look for the thing that gives you the same heartfelt passion and exhilaration and say yes to it. It’s more of what our world needs, and can help people learn how loved and welcome they really are.


You have the power to do that in your place, with your people, if you live a life of power. 

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