Note: I wrote this to my teenage daughters (aged 13 and 15) on the eve of the first day of school (grades 8 and 10) because the speaker at our youth camp had basically told me to share with them everything I've been praying for them. This hot mess of a letter is the result.
July 31, 2016
I am writing this to you because I am not great at talking
about the Important Stuff. I get sidetracked, your eyes glaze over, I start
waving my hands around, and before I know it 30 minutes have gone by and I’m
not sure I even communicated what I needed to.
What I’m writing today is Important. It’s Important because
on July 6, God decided to show my name to our speaker at camp because
He—God—had something to say to me. I cannot stress enough that THIS DOES NOT
HAPPEN EVERY DAY.
WHAT God
wanted to say to me—and to you and your sister—was so important that he
interrupted the speaker, and Camp, to tell us all about it.
I’ll recap what he said here:
What I have fought
for, I need to pass on to you guys.
What I have prayed
for you and your sister, I need to tell you so that God can make it happen.
What I have achieved
with Him, you guys will have the power and grace to do better.
I’ve spent a few weeks asking God exactly what I’m supposed
to bestow upon you girls, because if I’m honest, I pray for you all the time.
The teenage phase has pushed me to my limits (so far) of prayer and trust that
you, although you’re my daughters, are also GOD’S, and he is raising you.
I pray a lot for the stuff you’d expect me to: that you
don’t hurt your body with drugs or alcohol or an unwanted pregnancy; that you
don’t get your heart broken by a boy when you’re too young to recover; that you
have a healthy body image and know that it’s who you are not how you look that
counts.
AND THAT STUFF IS SUPER IMPORTANT…
But you could reach the age of 30 having achieved all of the
above and still miss what I really want for you: that you live a life of power.
Believe me, staying away from drugs and saving yourself for
marriage and being kind is a mother’s dream for her kids, but God’s dream is
more and bigger: that you live a life dependent on his Holy Spirit, which will
give you power to be radically kind,
adventurous, encouraging, daring, loving, outlandish, patient, creative, and
literally brilliant with who HE has made you to be.
It means actually loving your enemies. It means not giving a
crap about what that mean girl thinks of you; and even better, hoping and
praying for HER best, because she is a child of God, too. It means passing over
what is safe and “just okay” for what is amazing and makes you passionate. It
means saying “I don’t care if it’s normal or safe or popular or makes money,
it’s hard and it’s beautiful and it’s true so I’m doing it.”
The fact that God spoke through the camp speaker wasn’t just
for me, it was for you as well. Because our world needs people who love God in
a new way. A way that powerfully teaches young people—YOUR PEOPLE—who He is
without condemning them. A way that shows kindness over popularity and
compassion over “we’re going to Heaven and you’re not.” Being that person takes
work, and it takes God’s spirit, which is endlessly gracious, merciful, and
loves every darn person that breathes on this planet.
Be brave. Do important things. Don’t settle for a life that
is boring and empty, even as a teen, even in school. The reason camp and
mission trips are so meaningful is that we get closer to the place where God’s
kingdom and the world rub together (borrowing some words from our youth pastor
here); in those situations we are doing God’s work with His spirit, and they
feel real, like an adventure.
But life can be that way. School can be that way. Look for
the thing that gives you the same heartfelt passion and exhilaration and say yes
to it. It’s more of what our world needs, and can help people learn how loved
and welcome they really are.
You have the power to do that in your place, with your
people, if you live a life of power.
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